Of Marriage

I have a lengthy discussion with one of my friends concerning the type of woman to marry.
He was basically getting on my case due to the fact that I prefer to marry a Kikuyu lady.
Given that I have spent more than half of my life away from Kenya and away from Kikuyu people he didnt feel that I could justify my preference.
I have dated ladies from diverse cultures and actually have been more exposed to ladies of other cultures than I have been exposed to Kikuyu ladies., so I can defintely see why my friend doesnt seem to understand my preference.
At first I really did not understand why I prefer Kikuyu ladies.
I tried to reason that its the culture, the language, the communication etc; but all those reasons were done away with by my friend.
That got me really thinking; do I understand why I prefer what I prefer?
Then it hit me
I prefer to marry I Kikuyu lady because I would like to marry someone who is like my mother.
Let's face it, before your wife comes along, the only lady who knows you, nurtures you, loves you unconditionally is your mother.
So when you are looking for someone to settle down with, your mother's qualities seem to overshadow all others.
Its psychological; we make these choices without even realizing them.

Now dont get me wrong, you can find motherly qualities in ladies from other cultures, but given the choice of someone from your culture with the same qualities as another lady from another culture, you will most definitely choose the lady from your culture.
It is comforting to have someone who understands you fully---your culture, language, behaviour and most importantly has your best interest at heart just like your mother would.
So its not a racial thing at all; am just looking for someone to take Wairimu's place (that's my mother).
Now that doesnt mean that if someone from another culture came into my life and captured my heart I wouldnt take it to the next level.
Any thoughts?

A shot in the arm

On Monday I went to take a particular test; this test is supposed to be tricky and many people do not do well do to pressure.
I am glad to say that I got a 91 out of 99. This simply means that I am qualified for the top notch job available within this sector.
This comes at a time when I have been succumb to some self pity, so this was a great morale booster.
There is no manual or prescribed manner in which our lives are supposed to turn. There are many doors that have closed and there are new ones opening.
This turn of events is/was unexpected, but being alive and staying afloat requires dynamism. I am def up for the challenge and I cant wait to embark on this new journey as soon as all things are squared away.

Missed Mother's Day

I didnt call my mother yesterday to wish her a happy mother's day.
I could have but I couldnt get myself to.
My mother is a great lady; everloving, everpeaceful, caring, and all the other great qualities that a mother should have. That makes it very hard for me to talk to her at this point of my life. I am not where I should be (my definition and her's as well), as far as life progression. I have taken quite a few steps back and stagnated. Though I do not have to do well (society's definition) in order for my mother to love me, I personally feel ashamed talking or seeing her---knowing that she sees great potential in me and yet am not living up to those expectations.
She has made many sacrifices for me; she has been there to encourage me and help me grow up and I know she will always love me.
There is abit of self-pity in this post, but that is how I feel right now and so I state it.
I love my mom very much and I do not need to call her on the "one" day that is set apart for mothers to show her my love and appreciation, however there is a guilty feeling for not calling her.
It is my hope that my lifestyle will improve to the point where I can see pride in my mother's eyes, as for now I continue to strive knowing that she loves me no matter what, yet I must make right for all the sacrifices that she has taken for me.

I love you Mom and Happy Mother's Day

The road less travelled

In a few months, I will be hitting the big "30"
This is a big milestone for me.
I have been evaluating my life, decisions and actions that I have taken in my almost 30yrs in this world.
I am proud of many, and regretful of some.
Since there is no manual on how to live; and there is no prewritten definition of my life, I have to accept all that has happened to me.
As I grow older, I feel as if I am getting wiser.
Decisions and actions that I would have taken a few years ago no longer take priority in my life.
I am about to make another decision which will probably change my life (hopefully for the better), it is a decision that I will have to live with (everyday) for at least two years.
It is a decision that many would not make at this age but I feel it is appropriate for me.
There are some missing links in my life and I feel that this decision will guarantee some of them and at least initiate the process for others.
As Frost's poem says: "Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back." This decision is a life-changer and I am sure I will never come back to the point that I am in. And by God's grace I hope that this decision will make all the difference.
Here is Frost's poem The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference