Monday, September 5, 2011

Do I want to have kids?


This is a question that has been popping into my conversations lately. I guess it has to do with age, my affiliations, living with my nephews for almost a year and importance of such an issue at this time of my life.
I am not married, nor am I in a relationship but that does not mean I can not think of such things.
I have always feared that I am not ready to be a father but then again no one is ever prepared to deal with a little being who is 100% dependent on you.
It takes alot to be a parent and I think our generation has belittled the whole experience by engaging in careless sex and then taking the moral high ground against abortion (understand am not advocating abortion here, am simply stating that it is bewildering that some reckless behavior are a taboo while short term gratification that brings about the pregnancy and chances of contracting STD's is not seen as risky)

I am at the point that I feel prepared to be a father if the opportunity presented itself. I feel that I can provide the love, foundation and support that a child needs.
Here is some passage that I read that strengthened my desire to be a father...to play a role on in future generation:

“Children, who are not the end but only the possible and not the obligatory consequence of the union of a man and woman, are not automatically a prolongation of what their parents have been. And if all of us are at the same time jealous of the young (who just by existing, remind us adults of our death) and if we are always inclined to invest our own desire for immortality in them so that when we are no longer on the scene something of us will remain, this must not obscure the fact that every child represents the emergence of someone wholly other. An apparition of the future, the child relegates the generation before it to the past and rolls back the curtain of the future on a world that is new but neither engendered by history nor foreign to it, linked to the passage of time by an originative dialectic of continuity and rupture. The child is not primarily a reproduction of a parental model but a new venture, a unique and irreplaceable being who breaks through the known to open a way to the improbable. This is why the death of a child is a scandal that sends the parents back into the past, back to the known, the usual. For them the future dies, time closes up, life loses meaning.”

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